Kicking my new addiction to Crumbl Cookies | Opinion

Hello, my name is Mystery, and I am a Crumbl Cookie addict.

Ever since they showed up in Johnson City last January, I’ve been drawn like some crazed, blue, goggle-eyed Muppet to their aromatic front door, only to be refused entry because I would overload the store’s posted lobby limit of five customers.

It took my dining partner’s iron resolve that, at long last, got me through my Crumbl Cookies’ caused addiction.

first impression

Crumbl Cookies creates their magic and addictive baked goods on Johnson City’s North Roan Street in a row of storefronts across from The Mall at Johnson City. There is plenty of parking out front, and more around the sides.

The store has bright, almost clinically white walls. Once through the front door, you join a line that snakes first right and then left, passing a couple of data terminals where customers can input their order for pick up a mere six feet further along. Affixed to the wall above the terminals is a whiteboard of the week’s offerings with costs noted.

The cashier counter sports a 3-D display of the week’s offerings as well. Behind the cashier counter is the production area where 15 (or so) black-clad Crumbl Cookies employees are busy replenishing the store’s fresh-baked inventory.


The countertop display is your best bet to assist in making your style and quantity purchasing decision.

The daily selection comes in two sizes: Big’un for over-the-counter customers and Littl’un for those who have decided to engage Crumbl Cookies’ catering option.

Our week’s selections were Mint Brownie, Vanilla Sugar, Lucky Charms, Milk Chocolate Chip, Peanut Butter Cookies & Cream, and Sea Salt Toffee.

My dining partner and I chose a six-pack cookie box containing one of each of the week’s selections. Purchased individually at $3.83 per Big’un, this would run just shy of $23.

Crumbl Cookies sells the six-pack for $18.10.

How it tastes

Back home, my dining partner sliced ​​all six Big’uns in half for the two of us to enjoy.

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Beverage used was 1% milk, both as palate cleanser and sweetness diluter.

Beginning with Mint Brownie, I’d eaten half of my half when my dining partner had a bite of hers, made a face and then pushed the remains across to me, saying it was too “minty” for her taste. Ever the gentleman, I finished my Mint Brownie half before consuming the rest of hers, finding no problem with the level of mint in the cookie.

Next was Sea Salt Toffee. Though my palate favors caramels and toffees over chocolate, I wasn’t surprised that my dining partner collected my half of the Sea Salt Toffee Big’un in trade for her Mint Brownie.

I counted myself fortunate to have been given a taste of the Toffee, and was pleased with the way the dusting of sea salt kept the toffee sweetness under control.

The Milk Chocolate Chip cookie was next. Though it is listed as one of Crumbl Cookies’ perennial favorites, I found that my bit of Sea Salt Toffee cookie tasted better, and my dining partner thought so as well.

The Peanut Butter Cookies & Cream cookie tasted a bit like the Mint Brownie cookie, minus the mint flavoring, but with an uptick in crunch factor, a plus in my book. My dining partner said the blending of peanut butter mixed in well with the decidedly Oreo-tasting dark chocolate cookie.

Next was Lucky Charms, a sugar cookie that tasted almost exactly like a spoonful of Lucky Charms cereal without the milk. The cookie was topped with what appeared to be real Lucky Charms-style marshmallow bits; these were not the bit shapes and colors copyrighted by General Mills, though each had the same texture and “mouth-feel” as the original article.

Also, I’d wear that I tasted the powdered Lucky Charms cereal dust found at the bottom of the cereal box. Even my dining partner remarked on it.

Authenticity, anyone?

The last offering was the chilled Vanilla Sugar cookie, another of Crumbl Cookies’ perennial favorites. At this point I was getting pretty much sugared out, but my dining partner gamely soldiered on, finishing her half of the Vanilla Sugar cookie and the gold-wrapped chocolate coin on top.

The bottom line

Crumbl Cookies is a welcome addition to Johnson City. The store is immaculate, the service friendly, the products truly delicious, and yes, in my case addictive.

Thank goodness my dining partner spotted the symptoms before I got too far gone. I no longer consume whole six packs at one sitting, being content with just a single Big’un now.

Though I do still get “The Craving” when I drive up North Roan Street with the car windows rolled down.

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